Expectations

I remember reading somewhere, or listening to the radio somewhere, about the key to happiness being low expectations. There is certainly truth to that. It's like, if you expect a certain expensive restaurant to be the most mind blowing eating experience you'll ever have, and then it's just great, then you'll be disappointed and well presumably less happy than if you had no expectations for a good meal and ended up with a great meal.

Managing expectations I suppose, is a skill, and an art in these days. In this day and age, it is very easy for for someone to plan something, and then due to peer reviews and google and blah blah, come to reasonably expect something out of an experience. Basically, it's not hard to make sure that something doesn't suck. It takes you not putting any effort in, to be lazy, to opt out of being aware, to have absolutely no expectations for things by default.

Somehow, this relates to a chronic frustration of mine.
I am a planner. I like to organize things, and plan ahead. It isn't hard really, I mean, the internets make things quite plannable in many easy, your-ass-doesn't-even-have-to-leave-your-chair way. But that also means, I associate planned activity with a level of "effort". As in, since it is so easy for me to plan and arrange things, it is almost impossible for me to not equate not-planning as not giving a shit.

The problem is, since I plan so well, everybody else almost expects me to do the work, coz well, it's easy for me. That inevitably also makes me feel like, oh, if I don't give a shit, NOBODY ELSE gives a shit.

How do you balance that? I mean, how can I manage my expectations for things, with that? If I plan things, then I feel like oh man I have to do the work all the time, I'm a bit frustrated, but hey, I can expect something to happen and I won't be disappointed. If I *Don't* plan things, and things don't happen, then it's worse. I have almost expect things to not happen, and be disappointed. Then it's a validation of all the OMG NOBODY ELSE GIVES A SHIT expectation, and makes me preplan more, and thus create expectations more?

I really don't know how to do it. I can't not plan things, and also not expect anything.

Sometimes all I ever want, is for something unexpected to happen and be pleasantly surprised. Nothing big you know. I don't expect much. But is that already too much to expect?

I just want to be able to be a little irresponsible sometimes, and have someone else catch the ball. Have something that needs to be done that I don't have to worry about. It is so tiring to always have to line up all my ducks all the time. Is that too much to ask?